


Avoid a hello at all costs

by seven_of_cups



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Episode: s12e05 Fugitive of the Judoon, Gen, Post-Episode: s12e05 Fugitive of the Judoon, graham is just out here trying his best, jackham is real, not strictly a romance BUT, the doctor is an idiot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:21:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22433323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seven_of_cups/pseuds/seven_of_cups
Summary: Graham just wants to talk to the Doctor about The Kiss(tm) and, as usual, things get out of hand
Comments: 14
Kudos: 273





	Avoid a hello at all costs

**Author's Note:**

> spoilers for fugitive of the judoon! i'm still reeling from that episode and impulsively decided to write something about the very important scene we missed out on tonight

“So, Doc…” Graham trailed off, glancing around at the TARDIS controls, watching as she flipped switches and brushed her hair from her eyes, always and unflinchingly preoccupied. 

“Hmm?” she asked back as the ship whirred against her touch, like it was alive. Hadn’t the Doctor said as much? He really had to start rethinking what he’d previously assumed were jokes. He glanced back at the steps. Ryan and Yaz were sitting and talking, all hushed and serious looking. It had been an incredibly confusing day and besides some cryptic fragments about chameleon arches and Cybermen legions, as usual, none of them had been able to get much out of the Doctor. He took a tentative step closer to her, trying to be subtle.

“The bloke in the ship,” he started, and her gaze shot up to his, hooded and dark, mouth set into an impassive line. He frowned, leaning back away from her. She held every one of her thousands of years on her shoulders in that moment.  _ Thousands of years old _ _._ He’d be lying to himself if he said that didn’t scare him a bit.

“Jack,” she clarified, leaning over to press her palms into the console, hips back, the possessive stance of a mechanic. He nodded. 

“Yeah, Captain Jack, he…”

“Did he say something else to you?” she asked, something sparking in her gaze. Hope, perhaps? Despite knowing more than the rest of them about what was going on, the Doctor seemed the most confused. No.  _ Lost _ _._ Graham sighed and pressed his lips together, glancing back at Ryan and Yaz and then to the Doctor. 

“Not exactly,” he admitted, wondering if the two of them on the stairs could hear. He’d begun underestimating how far sound could travel since his own hearing had started to go. 

“Graham, what is it?” She looked concerned now, leaning closer as if to try and comfort him. She wasn’t big on physical contact. 

“He  _ kissed _ me,” Graham stage whispered, searching the Doctor’s gaze, watching for a reaction. He was surprised to find her instantly relaxing, the tension gone from her shoulders as her face split into a smirk, lazily righting herself. 

“Never thought I’d say this, but it’s good to know some things haven’t changed,” she admitted, some of that joyful intensity back in her eyes. It was infectious, and Graham smiled too, for a moment. Then his face flickered, and he cleared his throat, almost getting to his  _ point _ before the Doctor started up again. “‘Course usually I’m there to reign him in,” she offered, talking at full volume now, starting up the flicking of switches again. He swore they didn’t even mean anything. She just liked to do it. “Hellos from Captain Jack Harkness are dangerous. Avoid a hello at all costs. Unless you like that sort of thing, but he starts flirting at the most inconvenient times. Right when I need everyone focused. Usually in the middle of an invasion. Or World War Two,” she mused, scrunching her nose as she paused, lost in a memory. 

At this point, she’d gotten the attention of Ryan and Yaz who stood up and walked curiously towards the console. Graham sighed, knowing that somehow this would get out of hand. 

“Talking about Jack Harkness?” Ryan asked, glancing between them. “Said I was his favorite,” he boasted, just a bit, a hint of a smug smile on his face. Yaz scoffed through an amused smile, and Graham nearly said something before the Doc interrupted  _ again . _

“That’s how he gets you,” she warned, pointing a finger at him from across the console. 

“Right, but Doc,” Graham finally butt in. They all turned to him. “He thought I was  _ you _ _._ When he...you know…” 

“Kissed you?” the Doctor clarified, tilting her chin down and raising her brow.

“He  _ kissed _ you?” Ryan burst, mouth open, pressing his hands to his knees. “Right, I can’t believe I missed that,” he laughed, filling the room with electrified disbelief. 

“Did you like it?” Yaz asked, a bit to eagerly, teasing. 

“Alright, now, keep your socks on. He thought I was the Doc!” he reminded them, motioning to her. “Which is why,” he huffed, pressing his lips together in frustration, “I wanted to talk to you  _ privately _ _…_ ” 

“Why would you need privacy to talk about Jack?” she asked, genuinely confused. 

“Well we all know you have secrets,” he offered delicately. 

“Why would Jack be a secret?” she continued, frowning. 

“Dunno, you tell us.”

“He just never really came up. Besides, if I always talked about people from my past, I’d never shut up.” 

“You never shut up anyway,” Yaz added.

“Look, Doc,” Graham interjected quickly, hoping to keep the conversation from spiraling. Though it seemed like it already was. “It’s  _ your _ love life. I was just curious if you…”

“Love life?” the Doctor interrupted, properly confused now.

“Oh my god,” Graham sighed, throwing his hands up in exasperation, turning and taking a few steps away. Ryan snickered, and Yaz was watching the Doctor with curious amusement. 

“I think what Graham’s  _ trying _ to ask is are you and Jack dating?” she inquired as Graham turned back around. 

_ “ What _ _?”_ the Doctor laughed, leaning back and looking at them like they were growing second heads. “Captain Jack Harkness? Dating?  _ Me _ _?_ ‘Cause he kissed me? Well... _ Graham _ _._ No, Jack just does that sometimes,” she nodded pleasantly, as if that cleared everything up. 

“Jack just does that sometimes,” Graham repeated slowly. 

“Kinda his thing,” she mused, bouncing on her heels, starting to turn her attention back to the console. “One time, we were looking for a few rogue Zygons, and Jack took it upon himself to french kiss  _ every _ suspect just to see if they had those suckers under their tongues. Dead give away, that. Told him he didn’t have to. I gave him a scanner. Looked at me with this great big smirk and said:  _ sometimes the old fashioned way is better _ _._ Bloody idiot got himself captured pretty quick. So I had to…” 

Graham stopped listening then as he tried to process the mess of information he’d just been given. He saw Ryan lean in close to Yaz.

“You noticed how Graham didn’t answer your question, right?” he half whispered to her. She grinned back at him. 

“Definitely noticed that, yeah.” 


End file.
